The geekiest tech jokes on the internet by lyndsey gilpin lyndsey gilpin is a former staff writer for techrepublic, covering sustainability and entrepreneurship. The best top rated funny short dirty jokes of all time. Good engineers are not born, they are prefabricated 2. Best 10 clean jokes on the net funniest jokes hundreds of. Here are some programming puns that every coder will definitely relate to. A quora user asked for some good engineering jokes. Ok, so engineers arent necessarily renowned for their scintillating wit. A physicist walks in, takes a bucket of water, pours it around the fire and waits for the fire to put itself out. In this post, we have collected a handful of jokes, that have been floating around the web, which showcase a programmers sense of humor.
A software engineer meets another software engineer. Jokes must be in text format, no emojis or linking. These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages. Hvac jokes and memes 25 of the best weve found fieldpulse. An architect, artist, and engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with their wives or mistresses. We do a job that most people really dont understand, which means there is a rich vein of comedy material that only us engineers will understand. If you laugh at these jokes, then you are most definitely a computer geek. A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The funniest collection of engineering puns found on the. The chemical engineer said, the way it sputtered at the end, i dont think its getting gas. Mar 20, 2019 the engineer comes in to talk to his chief engineer. Lazy engineers engineering is all about laziness in the name of a better life. The engineer tried to remember things about differential pressures, but resorted to climbing the steeple and lowering a string on a plumb bob until it touched the ground and then. Then one day a software engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber.
He smells the smoke, wakes up, unplugs the coffee maker, throws it out the window, and goes back to sleep. Civil and mechanical engineering joke pictures to share on whatsapp and facebook. Sex jokes a collection of new and old dirty adult jokes that will put a cheeky smile on your face. A software engineer, a mechanical engineer, and an electrical engineer are carpooling to work, when suddenly the car stops running and they pull over. A software engineer, a hardware engineer and a branch manager were on their way to a meeting. After all, engineers are tasked with designing and making things that carry disastrous consequences if they go awry, from bridges to pacemakers. Basic professional ethics would instead require him to write a destroycity procedure, to which baghdad could be given as a parameter. Mar 09, 2007 dirty jokes 5 doctor jokes 1 email forwards 27 engineer jokes 1 facts 21 flash animations 1 forwards 126 friendship 2 friendship images 1 friendship quotes 1 fun 42 funny 112 funny pictures 17 funny videos 25 games 1 girls jokes 1 good morning 8 health 1 hilarious 56 hindi 1 husband and wife jokes 5. The engineer looked up the model and serial number in his redrubberball table. When most people think about engineers, they probably imagine men and women working long hours to fix a broken machine or develop. The geekiest tech jokes on the internet techrepublic. Read the latest and best funny jokes that will make you laugh for a long time. The mechanical engineer says, i think its a problem with the engine.
Whats the difference between a used car salesman and software salesmen. Sometimes this is awkward, sometimes it blows up the crowd. An engineer, a chemist and a mathematician are staying in three adjoining rooms at an old motel. Flush out all of the gas and replace it with new gas and you will see that the car will be fine. Each one has social sharing links, so feel free to. Whats the difference between a blonde and a computer. The wizardry compiled by rick cook one hundred little bugs in the code. What human body part is long, hard, bendable, and contains the letters p,e,n,i,s. Engineers say the glass is twice as big as necessary.
Well have to strip down the engine before we can get the car working again, says the mechanical engineer. An engineer walks in and pours a bucket on the fire, it doesnt go out so he goes off to check the fire safety standards. The physicist placed the ball in a beaker of water and measured the total displacement. The third engineer, who was a chemical engineer, said, its just a problem with the fuel.
The toilet only has to deal with one asshole at a time. Im having trouble with that power supply circuit you put me to work on. Browse this collection of engineering jokes, engineering riddles, and other engineer humor to try out at the next gathering of engineers. It couldnt be removed from an engineers nature to have this kind of humor, especially at parties. Then read the best engineer jokes and funny engineer jokes on jokerz. Just been arrested by the police after recently being given the part of romeo in my local theater. What did the structural engineer say to the architect. Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it.
Fortunately, the mechanical engineer is driving because the brakes fail as they are going downhill. We tried to find jokes about the job, ac systems, heating system repair, ac repair, and daily life. There is also the followup copying code directly from stack overflow. The three most dangerous things in the world are a programmer with a soldering iron, a hardware engineer with a software patch, and a user with an idea. Share flipboard email print huntstock, getty images. Offensive jokes are fine as long as they are still jokes. A collection of short, funny jokes about engineers. Computer jokes engineer jokes manager jokes software jokes. What are some good jokes about software engineering. Funniest joke ever 60 funny clean jokes 78 funny dirty jokes 177 funny husband wife jokes 71. The architect said, i like spending time with my wife building a firm foundation of a marriage. The artist said, i enjoy the time i spend with my mistress because of.
You all have probably already seen these, but heres a compilation. Funny clean jokessoftware engineers funny clean jokes. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer were given a red rubber ball and told to find the volume. There are four engineers driving home from a car donation warehouse. Explore 9gag trending for the rising memes, interesting stories, awesome gifs, and viral videos on the internet. Engineer jokes jan 30, 2019 its possible you might have to be an engineer to truly appreciate engineering jokes and humor, but if you get the jokes, they are certainly funny. Sep 06, 2018 whether youre a business owner or an hvac tech, sometimes you have to take a step back from the work and have a good laugh. One day, a mechanical engineer, electrical engineer, chemical engineer and computer engineer were driving down the street in the same car. I dont have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now thats cool. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed. If you like, ill be happy to consult with you on the behavior of your processes. Lets you find jokes based on the topic youre looking for, who you are and what you do. So we rounded up the top 25 best hvac jokes and memes we could find. Developers life contain some funny but true situations.
Hilariously rude humor that looks at the funny side of sex. A programmer and a software engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from san jose to bangalore. Here are some more funny stories and jokes about engineers, friday funny. Weve got lots of jokes from clean jokes to dirty jokes, funny pictures and comics. Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes failed. Funny we computer geeks are a breed of our own, and as with any.
Funny engineering jokes that maybe only engineers will get. Why is a thicker conductor necessary to carry a current in a. The mechanical engineer eventually brings the car safely to a halt and gets out to examine the hydraulic systems. Engineer jokes short funny engineer jokes one liners jokerz. With all the funny antidotal stories about engineers they must be getting a complex. Whats the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers. Boss and leader game developer jobs engineering quotes funny engineering general engineering civil engineering funny jokes hilarious nerd jokes. My mom said that if i dont get off my computer and do my homework shell slam my head on the keyboard, but i think shes. Engineering joke an engineer is someone who uses a slide rule to multiply two by two. The software engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. Take a look at them and tell us what your favorite is. A software engineer, a hardware engineer and a department manager were on their. Funny, but dirty jokes funny, but dirty short stories. Pisa typeface html humor computer science humor, computer jokes, computer teacher, programming humor.
Dirty jokes funny oneliners cheesy jokes funny pick up lines. Engineering jokes 1 engineering jokes 2 engineering jokes 3 engineering jokes 4 engineering jokes 5 engineering jokes. Funny oneliners to add to your bugzilla quip list says. You only have to put information into a computer once. Funniest joke ever 60 funny clean jokes 78 funny dirty jokes 177 funny husband wife jokes 71 good clean jokes 65. Powerstreams power humor page including stupid power supply. How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb.
Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him, and fold up a road map the wrong way. Tease your brain with these cool mind boggling puzzles and jokes that will stump you. A computer engineer, a systems analyst, and a programmer were driving down a. Find jokes lots of jokes funny jokes, pictures and videos. Another solution for iphone x scrolling embracing the notch. The car careened out of control, bouncing off guard rails until it ground to a halt along the mountainside. Engineering a sense of humor, revisited back in august 2008, i posted a collection of engineering jokes which is still one of facilityblogs most popular posts to date. Funny software engineer joke software engineer jokes. January 14, 2020 this page is for all the engineering students, sweating it out at the daily grind of becoming an engineer. We have divided and organized all the jokes, riddles, insults and pick up lines into different categories, to make is easier for you to find your favorites pieces. All these jokes are now illustrated at my new programming comic. Dirty jokes jokes, funny pictures, hilarious email forwards. Volume of a red ball found by an engineer a mathematician, scientist and engineer were tasked with finding the volume of a red ball.
An ac current goes up and down drawing a sinusoid and requires more space inside the wire, so the wire has to be thicker. Engineering humour engineering jokes engineering funny. We did our best to bring you only the best jokes about engineers. It should be noted that no ethicallytrained software engineer would ever consent to write a destroybaghdad procedure. What is the difference between an engineer and a toilet. Oct 12, 2015 21 of the best sales jokes ever the right joke can make for a great icebreaker when networking or speaking in public. Dedicated to humor and jokes relating to programmers and. Aug 17, 2017 funny videos please subscribe, like and comment. We have a great collection with the best engineer jokes at. Software engineering humor uni department of computer. Mechanical engineers build weapons, civil engineers build targets.
What are the best programmer jokes you want to share. Feb 19, 2016 thats not funny see more ideas about humor, funny and engineering humor. What are some small and precise jokes but very meaningful and funny at the same time. What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers. The human body three engineering students were gathered. We do make exceptions for extremely offensive jokes. I need an engineering related joke i want suggestions for an engineering related one liner thats both funny, true, and that someone can see being used on a tshirt. The first is a mechanical engineer, the second an electronics engineer and the third is a software engineer. Software engineer, a hardware engineer and a branch manager were on their way to a meeting. Thats why we compiled this list of our favorite jokes, comics, and quotes for our consultants. Funny engineer jokes and observations fill this category. An introverted engineer looks at his shoes when hes talking to you, an extroverted engineer looks at your shoes when hes talking to you.
Engineer jokes three freshman engineering students were sitting together at lunch time, when one brought up the question of who designed the human body. Engineer jokes short funny engineer jokes one liners. Is there any more software developer humor that you would add. The car careened almost out of control down the road, bouncing off the crash barriers, until it miraculously ground to a halt scraping along the mountainside. But definitely, when you read in your mind, its a laugh. Whats the difference between doctors and engineers. A software engineer, a hardware engineer and a branch manager find more jokes in. Heres a chemical engineer joke i made up, and an older engineering joke. Ok, turn the power to your mac off, hold down the mouse clicker, and power the mac back up. Human design joke adult jokes, dirty jokes, funny jokes.
It also differs in the delivery when the pun is spoken. The programmer leans over to the software engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. See the full thread here, but below are my favorites. My mom said that if i dont get off my computer and do my homework shell slam my head on the keyboard, but i. They spend their whole lives on dirty, illmaintained computers, and they are. Here you will find different jokes, riddles, pick up lines and insults. Theres a fire in the middle of a room and 3 buckets of water in the corner. We break down lots of jokes into categories that should point you in the right direction. Engineer jokes best engineer humor native pakistan.
We have a great collection with the best software jokes at. The mathematician measured the diameter and evaluated a triple integral. What are the most popular computer programming jokes. Weve looked high and low for some of the best engineering jokes.
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